One thing that really reframed this for me recently, was learning that we actually lose access to our prefrontal cortex when RSD strikes, and only our emotional centers are activated - and highly activated. We need a break because we literally cannot access the part of the brain that helps us to resolve the real or perceived conflict. That gave me (and my partner) a lot of understanding for these situations.
I think it's a fear response, and so that's accurate. And the immediate CBT strategy of are you imagining it pisses me off. Safety first. And that can take a long time for ADHD brains to feel like they are not under threat.
Yup, my partner and I were recently talking about what BS the "never go to bed angry" advice is for neurodivergent folks (I am AuDHD, and they are Autistic). Emotional safety is so important and worth the temporary discomfort (said by a highly impatient person).
One thing that really reframed this for me recently, was learning that we actually lose access to our prefrontal cortex when RSD strikes, and only our emotional centers are activated - and highly activated. We need a break because we literally cannot access the part of the brain that helps us to resolve the real or perceived conflict. That gave me (and my partner) a lot of understanding for these situations.
I think it's a fear response, and so that's accurate. And the immediate CBT strategy of are you imagining it pisses me off. Safety first. And that can take a long time for ADHD brains to feel like they are not under threat.
Yup, my partner and I were recently talking about what BS the "never go to bed angry" advice is for neurodivergent folks (I am AuDHD, and they are Autistic). Emotional safety is so important and worth the temporary discomfort (said by a highly impatient person).
This is so helpful… and a totally new concept for me. Thank you for the enlightenment!!
I'm so glad this is helpful for you Lorna